suddenly…tears

I have been a cry baby since I was born, Shed millions of tears specially in my early adulthood. Why? I really don’t know, is it a sign of resignation? failure? hopelessness? happiness or relief? Why do we shed tears? I never really fathom why, it won’t do me any good at all. I just end up with puffy eyes, red nose and chest pains when I cry. I am always in denial, well that’s what’s perceived of me.

Suddenly my tears to escaped my eyes, not knowing why exactly (again). Let me figure it out first. I guess my subconscious mind is telling me to acknowledge the pain building up inside me, the worries I’ve pushed aside. You see I can never start to deal with worries and stress properly, my first reaction is to shove it aside and pretend as if nothing is wrong and live a day at a time but I know there are ways to deal with it properly and I know that I should start now or else it will consume me whole.

It’s suppose to free me of the building pressure but it just makes me more sad, more tensed, more stressed. I just want to be genuinely happy, not putting up facades every single day. Torn from what’s real and wishes still, I now have to make the first step to my discovery and development…easier said than done.  😀

Have you had tears all of a sudden escaping you?

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One thought on “suddenly…tears

  1. bendedspoon says:

    you will get tired of it and will sincerely smile instead.
    i did and that inspired my post ‘It’s my happy birthday’.
    keep the faith 🙂

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